The seasons of life - Nesting dolls week 5

"Ah, kindness. What a simple way to tell another struggling soul that there is love to be found in this world.

Theme: Love, life and learning

Week: 5

Throughout my life I have examined my place in this world, seeking a purpose that explains who I am and what path to follow. The pandemic dropped me into a phase of questioning, A deeper dive into who I am. Does my behavior derive from the order of birth or the circumstances in my life? As a middle child full of compromise; growing up l left the decision making to others, since where I sat in the car never quite mattered. 

Being a shy child, who grew into a quieter adult, I became unfamiliar with the use of my own voice. In a room full of noise, it was easier to be silent. And as the years slipped by, I let many thoughts and ideas fade into the background. Allowing myself to be shaped by the approval of others, instead of trailing my own path. The decisions of others always appeared sturdier in my quiet world.

Eventually with time and knowledge, each chapter of life cultivated a new path to roam. The child I was merged into the adolescent I became, each rung a journey towards adult, parent, and grandparent. The stages gather like nesting dolls, collecting all the phases of my life where that shy child still nests within the confident adult.  

Looking back at the lessons of my life I now soften to the scars of remembrance. Embracing what I thought were imperfections, and knowing they are the best parts of who I am. The uneven edges of quiet, where my insecurities were shadowed by doubt, eventually blossoming into love and tenderness, and a space that would rather error with kindness. 

Reading the words written by Mark Nepo, I had arrived full circle. “I would rather be fooled than not believe.” Those words took me back to the nesting doll versions of myself. When I kept showing up kind, risking the wound of betrayal, knowing I’d rather be made a fool then not believe there is better in this world. 

Because that is what we do, as human beings, seek the good, be the good. Although, like many, I have been stung, I discovered the softness hidden within each act of kindness. When we lift one another, we are actively making the world a better place.  

I’d rather be fooled than not believe in the goodness of others. 

Currently reading: The Prophet

Currently listening to: The midnight library

Did you know how the months got their names?

February – Comes from the word februum (purification) and februa, the rites or instruments used for purification. These formed part of preparations for the coming of Spring in the northern hemisphere.

Link to past seasons of life posts